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Where to Find Support for Your Ambitions Being a South Asian Girl

The barriers coming between an Asian girl's dreams and where to find help.

By Aleesha AhmedPublished 7 years ago 5 min read
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Having a specific goal in life requires one to be committed, dedicated and motivated. However, in some cases, the commitment and dedication are present, but the motivation and support are lacking. This is very common, especially in the Southern Asian culture, being a girl in particular. It doesn't matter where you live, whether, in Asia or the West, it still happens everywhere around the world.

There are many reasons as to why these barriers exist...

Marriage

The pressure of marriage amongst many young girls of this culture plays a big role in creating an obstacle between a girl and her dreams, even in this day and age!

The phrase "you have to get married now, you're getting old" is perhaps the most frequently used phrase among the stricter parents of this culture. The world is composed of many girls who do not feel ready to take on the responsibility of marriage but are pressurised to do so, due to cultural obligations, where their traditional parents feel that it is an obligation to marry off their daughter "on time" when they reach a certain age.

But, what about their goals and ambitions in life? Many Asian parents tell their children that they can carry on living the dream they want after they are married, but realistically speaking, is that really the same as being a single, independent woman?

Moreover, even when being married, there are chances that a girls' husband may not be as supportive as you would like him to be. Him approving of you having a job may be the main cause. Although it is a stereotypical thing that the male is the breadwinner, while the female has the instrumental role, it is fair to say that times have changed, but, HAVE they actually changed?

Society

Asian society is another primary factor as to why some traditional Asian families feel the need to deprive their daughters of going further with a specific ambition. "What will people say?" is a never ending phrase which is generally used by them. Being an Asian myself, I have had to go through this.

Even wanting to go abroad for a specific ambition alone is forbidden by traditional parents, unless their daughter is married, again, as "what will people say" if she ever went alone? Society finding it difficult to mind their own business will always be present, but learning to avoid societal thoughts to do something positive, is something an Eastern Asian girl should consider.

Where To Get Help

Although our parents love us, no matter what, they want to protect us, but getting a little too overprotective is an issue, isn't it? So, gaining help from the external world is definitely something to consider.

Friends

It is important to have a strong relationship with your close friends. Talking to them about attaining the goals you want in life is quite helpful, especially as your friends may be around the same age group as yourself. I believe that this makes a difference, as growing up in the same generation, means that your thoughts and advice have strong similarities with one another, as they could also be in a similar situation as you.

Most of us have that relationship with our friends where we just go on and on about everything and anything in life, I know I do! We're like each others' therapists. Through daily discussions, I came to make a decision of what I wanted to study at university. Although my parents wanted me to study something associated with Science (as many typical Asian families want) I was able to go on to studying something more theoretical, something that I wanted, and they were gradually happy for me.

Counselors/Teachers

These people are excellent resources when seeking support for fulfilling your goals and ambitions for the future. After all, it is their job to help people become successful in something they want to achieve, and guiding those people towards their potential goal is something they like doing.

Even though some girls of the Southern Asian culture do not get the motivation and support from home, it helps to speak to someone, as the motivation from professional help increases you to stay put on the dream you have always wanted to follow.

Yourself

There are a number of people out there who are more than willing to help you with their recommendations and advice; though, it solely depends on YOU to take that step and chase the dream that you are desiring for to come true, despite it being difficult because of cultural factors.

I have encountered that, through experience, it would be a lot beneficial for you being the one who takes the initiative in attaining the dream you really wish to come true. Nothing in life will be given to you; it will take a great deal of effort, enthusiasm, commitment, and self-motivation to attain that mindset.

Culture is a beautiful trait, no doubt, and I am proud to be what I am! But, the few unreasonable rules creating a blockage for a girl to follow her ambition ruins the beauty of it. The unwanted input of society shouldn't let this be a barrier.

Being a Muslim, coming from a religion which promotes the status of a woman to be high, a religion which consists of many examples of successful women, why should we let a few obstructive cultural thoughts come between the appropriate goals we want to achieve? We shouldn't!

Today, there are many examples of successful Asian women, and to go towards success, we should follow on in their footsteps. The sky is the limit!

gender roles
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About the Creator

Aleesha Ahmed

A passionate and dedicated individual who believes in humanity and justice

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