Viva is powered by Vocal.
Vocal is a platform that provides storytelling tools and engaged communities for writers, musicians, filmmakers, podcasters, and other creators to get discovered and fund their creativity.
How does Vocal work?
Creators share their stories on Vocal’s communities. In return, creators earn money when they are tipped and when their stories are read.
How do I join Vocal?
Vocal welcomes creators of all shapes and sizes. Join for free and start creating.
To learn more about Vocal, visit our resources.Show less
Hi there, it's Luna again. By my previous stories, you're maybe under the impression that I am girly and maybe even weak minded, or not. I can assure you that I'm nothing like that. I'm a proud strong woman who can defend myself and who I love.
Each day, I read bad news on my iPhone: Terrorist attacks, murders, conjugal violence, and it strikes me every time. Where is the world going? This era is known to be the least violent/dangerous one in the world's history (I know, I majored in history). It's supposed to be safer because we have police, justice systems, laws, doctors, and gender equality. Is it really true for the last one. Are women as equal to men as we speak? Are women weaker than men? I don't think so. I think it's a sad stereotype projected by society in society. We are this fragile thing that need protection. Every nude female model, every girl on covers of magazines, every perfect face, perfect body, and perfect image is contributing to keep the real women (like you and me) ashamed of themselves. Where there's shame and low self-esteem, there are abusers. Here's my story... I wasn't a victim then, nor will I ever be. That's a promise I can keep...
I was 20 years old and always had nice boyfriends. Never jerks, sometime stupid or silly, but none violent. I was always against cheating because my dad did it to my mom, and the woman after her and probably the actual one too. So imagine what I think about conjugal violence. It's a big fat NO for me. In a way I never understood people beat by their loved one. Why it's not easy to just get out, move somewhere else, call the police, I don't know, do something about it! And I still didn't understand after Noah.
It was a sunny day by the beach. My friends and I were getting some woods for the fire we were assembling. Lina almost dislocated my shoulder by "banging" on it.
"Look over there!" she said. I looked and saw a really gorgeous guy walking on the beach with a dog. "OMG look at that pretty thing," I said laughing. The stranger was more than six foot, brown hair, beautiful set of abs and a smile really caliente. I thought "I don't stand a chance with this type of man" so I turned away and continued what I was doing. I was wrong, I had a chance and, like you'll see later, he even stayed in town for me...
The night was breezy but hot, our fire was a total success, we were almost thirty people around it. We were drinking and laughing and talking. Around 10 o'clock, THE tall stranger we had seen during the day, walked by our party and looked at us. In the reflection of the fire, he was perfect. His eyes were green (grass green), his smile could've put out the fire, and talking of fire, there was one below my belt. He was physically my perfect match. I was head over heels, fixing him, when he came across my gaze. Discrete like a rolling 250 pounds rock in a ceramic plates store, I was suddenly really fascinated by the fire. A few seconds passed and when I looked again, he was still looking at me.
I think it took two whole hours for us to finally engage a conversation. He was charming, flattering, and a lot more. We talked and laughed for a while and we went for a walk.
"So, are you living in town?" I asked.
"No, I come from Montreal. I'm visiting my aunt here. Actually, I came with my mother. We are staying at my aunt downtown. And you, are you living here or you're visiting too?"
"No, not visiting, I lived here for all my life." I was disappointed that he lived so far away. "So when are you going back?" I was almost afraid to ask.
"In three weeks, I just got here two days ago," he responded with a bright smile. "I'm lucky to have met you this early," he said. Stopping, he took my hand and made me spin on myself. I found that weird but adorable. I wasn't use to be swept off my feet like that. It was really nice. He drew me in his arms and we started to dance. Just like that... without any music... wow!
"So... three weeks... are you coming back to the Beaches soon?" (the Beaches is a district in my hometown)
"Yeah, a friend of my mother have a chalet at the end of the beach." He lowered his head, looked me in the eyes, and said, "I'm coming to think that it's gonna be my favorite place." I probably melt a little between his arms. Like I said before, he was everything I was looking for in a man, I was already caught in his web. After a few minutes, we stopped dancing and restarted to walk. Our fingers entangled together, he never dropped my hand. An hour later, we were coming back to the fire. Nothing more happened that night... it was love at first sight.
I didn't see him for two days. We didn't exchange phone numbers or address so fate would be the only way to see him again. And fate is a marvelous thing 'cause I saw him the very next day. I was on my patio and I saw him from afar. He seemed to be looking at each house he crossed. I thought to myself, maybe he's looking for me. I laughed at me for being such an helpless romantic and continued checking him approached. When he saw me in front of my house, an ear to ear smile appeared on is face.
"I was looking for you," he said, not embarrassed at all. "It's a pretty big district, I just walked for an hour." RED FLAG, I should've got that one, but I didn't. I was too occupied to smile like a hormones raging teenage.
"Is that true? Hope you like what you found," I said, obviously flirting.
"Yeah... I do," he simply said. Still in the street he asked, "Can I come join you?"
"Sure," I didn't hesitate.
He climbed the patio and took a chair. "Do you want something to drink?"
"Yes please... do you have a beer?" Unconsciously, I look at my watch and it was only 10 AM. Another RED FLAG.
"No sorry, I don't drink much. I have lemonade, water, coffee, and orange juice," I offered. But he declined politely.
We talked under the hot sun for two hours and at the end, we had a date. I was super pumped up about it. I didn't think it would have gone this way. We said our goodbyes, 'cause he got something to do with he's mom. I watched him go away and after he was out of my sight, I made the victory dance (really cheesy one haha), I couldn't believe I had a date with an awesome looking creature like him. (OMG!!)
The first date was really great. We ate, talked, walked on the beach, made a fire, and at midnight... (cliché right?)
"You wanna go for a swim," I said.
"Yeah, let's do it," he said while removing his shirt. We didn't have swim suits on, so underwear was the realistic option. (It's like a swim suit, am I right?) I have to specify, normally I wear underwear that doesn't match together, like a blue bra and yellow panties. (I do not care about matching these up) That night (Thank God) I was wearing a black lace bra and black panties (sexy mama); I was smoking hot. (I rarely compliment myself, but that night, I was worth a swear or two.) When I was finished undressing myself by the fire, I looked at him and he wasn't moving. He was removing the rest of my clothes with his eyes. I felt really beautiful and at the same time really shy that I was under inspection like that. So I guessed it was my turn to look and I wasn't disappointed. Good figure, strong abs and arms, tight boxer, muscular legs, and... a really big bulge in his undies. My face must've flashed red in the dark 'cause he looked at me knowing exactly what I was looking at a second ago and what I was thinking right about now. I bit my lower lip and started to run towards the sea.
I was still running in the water when I reached the sandbank (low tide). I stopped, threw myself in the deep water, and turned just in time to see him dive under and disappear a few feet from me. After a minute or so, I was starting to get nervous because he wasn't resurfacing, and then I felt something brush my right calf. I froze, something pulled me under, and then that something kissed me (I wasn't abducted by a merman, I swear). Noah tightened his grip around my waist for a second and released me. Out of breath, I pushed myself to the surface. I threw my arms around his neck and we kissed, we laughed, and we spent a good time.
So you get that the beginning of our relationship was fun, light, and sunny. It was supposed to be a summer fling, obviously because he was living in Montreal. (Remember?) But he stayed in town for me and found a job. As far I was concerned, he was the love of my life... future had other plans.
Two months later, the dream was over. I was aware of the fact that he liked too much a good beer, or beers. That he was aggressive when he was drinking. He was constantly repeating, "I stayed for you... bla bla bla." So, at the beginning, when he was getting too drunk, I was going home. Sex wasn't happening often, our relationship was off the track. One night, we were in a trailer with some of my friends and he came back, after taking a piss, half of his face covered in blood. I sprang off my chair in concern. I wanted to touch his face to check if he was okay, but he yelled at me, "Don't touch me bitch." (Naturally, he was drunk.)
That night, the remains of our relationship just exploded. I was mortified and embarrassed because my friends just witnessed the scene. In defense, I yelled, "Then you can die, I don't give a shit," and stormed out. We didn't talk for a week.
When he came crawling back, I gave him a second chance. I was young and naive, and wanted to be loved and cherished (wrong way to achieve that). He went two weeks without alcohol, things almost came back like they were and my birthday arrived...
My birthday is in August. In my part of the country, it's pretty freezing when mid-August arrived, but still, we decided to make a big fire and make an event out of it. Everything went great. I invited a couple of friends, we gathered woods, we had fun, and some of us even ate on the beach. I remember, hot dogs on a little fire, no ketchup or mustard, just like that. When the celebration started, I was nervous 'cause Noah already had three beers. I was trying to convince myself that it'll be okay. For two hours, it was perfect. I danced, went in the water (really cold), drank a little myself. And Noah happened...
I have many male friends and I was hugging one of them (I was a little tipsy). While I was hugging him, he imprisoned me in his arms and started to dance. A little Olé Olé, I followed without question. Noah arrived from nowhere and pushed Jason. Jason let me go and turned around on defense mode. Before anything happened I put myself in the middle.
"Hey hey guys... no fight here, understood?" I yelled. My gaze went back and forth between the two bulls. I grabbed a fistful of Noah's shirt and dragged him away to fight with him, again. I tugged on him so hard that he dropped his beer. We walked for five minutes straight before I stopped and faced him.
"You're stupid or what? Why on Earth would you provoke Jason like that?" I only had questions for him.
"He was groping you in front of everyone," he yelled.
"He wasn't groping me you idiot, we were dancing, like friends do sometimes." I was really mad at him.
Maybe it was the idiot part, but his face changed completely. Suddenly, he was really pissed off. I was alone, really far away from friends or protection of any kind. He pushed me saying, "You're just a bitch that slept with all these guys." He pushed me again. "You're a slut and I see that now. It sickened me to think that I stayed in this hellhole for you." He pushed me a third time before raising his right hand above his head. When it came crashing down towards my face, I deflected his assault and punched him with my right fist straight in the face (I boxed for years). He stepped back and I started to run. I wasn't fast enough because he caught me and made me fall. Remember when I said I was young and naive? I can assure you, despite those things, I'm not defenseless. He was overpowering me, but I was strong as well. I was lying on my belly and he was on top of me. I found the way to put my arms under me and push. Inch by inch, I was lifting him, until I had enough room to make move. Since I couldn't escape, I turned around. (You can hardly defend yourself if you're lying on your belly, really difficult). So once I was on my back, he tried to imprison my hand above my head, but before he had the chance to do that, I struck again. The top of my wrist (the round part at the bottom of the hand) entered in contact with his nose. I heard a crack and he screamed in pain (I broke his nose). He loosened his grip and I saw an opportunity to attack.
For those who don't know how to defend themselves against rapists, here's how it's done. Still on my back, I trapped his left foot between the back of my right thigh and my right heel, I flipped him over (on my right side), drove a knee hard in the groin area, gave him three right punches in the face, and when I was certain he wouldn't stand up for a bit, I went for a run (I could've beat Usain Bolt for sure).
Back at the party...
Nathan was the first one that saw me running. I looked like an animal that was hit by a truck. My hair was messed up, I had sand everywhere, and my tank top was a little bit ripped up. "What happened? Where's Noah?" he asked.
"I don't know... (I was out of breath) I ran as fast as I could," I said, sitting on the ground and taking my breath back.
Jason sat beside me, and soon half of my friends were around me. I told them what happened, how I defended myself, how I left him on the beach, nose broken, groins swollen, and face in a hurry for medical attention. I didn't cry because I wasn't shaking, I wasn't scared. I was really f****** mad at myself, mostly for taking him back after the last tantrum he made in the trailer.
Without a word, Jason, Nathan, and Daniel took off in the same direction I came running a few minutes ago. I think I never saw Noah again and I never asked my friends if they found him that night. I couldn't care less about what happened to him. Maybe he got what he deserved, maybe not. However, I can say one thing: I will never be beat down psychologically or physically by nobody. I am strong mentally, I am beautiful inside and outside, I am who I am. Don't let the world around you beat you up, instead smash through it, keep your head held up high, and scream to the world: I AM WHO I AM.
Dear reader, enjoy life, that's all...