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Reel Cover Girl

Muslim girl behind the camera.

By Fatimah JawadPublished 6 years ago 17 min read
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The Reel Cover Girl

Does art imitate life or life imitate art? As a young minority woman growing up in a time when we are constantly bombarded with corporate advertisements and political campaigns in our media, I find it necessary to express true life in a way that not only educates the masses but informs them as well. My passion is to use film as an art form to express life. By taking the path as a Documentary Filmmaker, I am possibly able to answer this age-old question, while exposing the messages of the people and subjects that are often unheard.

In my early years, around the age of ten, I began to see the importance of having access to alternative media outlets. This was near the time that our country saw a dynamic change in media coverage. I began to realize that people witnessed the same dramatic heartbreaking event of September 11th differently. As our country united and mourned during this unfortunate time, the Muslim community faced a huge backlash in media outburst. The media began to label Muslims as terrorists. By definition the word terrorist is, “a person or a group of people who uses violence and intimidation, especially against civilians, in a pursuit of political aim.” (dictionary.com) I have personally noticed harassment and retaliation against innocent individuals within our community. My parents began to fear certain aspects of society because I wore a hijab; a head covering worn in public by Muslim women. They thought that I would become a target for bullying in the public school system and felt that my safety could be better ensured if I continued my education at home. Saying goodbye to the friends I made at school was difficult, but I soon began the process of homeschooling, none the less. Being at home most of the day, while I worked on my studies, allowed me to have access to a variety of information that flowed through the various news media outlets. I began to understand that not everything being reported was entirely accurate. In 2003 – 2004, my older brother served his country as United States Marine and fought in Operation Iraqi Freedom I. Upon his return, he slowly revealed events that he experienced while serving overseas. As I listened to his untold reminiscences of battle stories, it became evident that he was confronted with discrimination and retaliation within the ranks of the military due to his religious beliefs. I struggled with my perception until later year I saw the Michael Moore documentary film, Fahrenheit 9/11. This was an impactful film as it exposed some controversial claims that I had been feeling all along. I became increasingly intrigued with fact finding in storylines told by individuals as they witnessed them. This film inspired me to become a Documentarian in my own right. I knew that I was going to make my contribution in media and express the modern life of Islam in America.

While I was an undergraduate student, my first documented film was inspired by a prominent Muslim family that immigrated from Palestine to the United States in with the hope of pursuing the American dream. The family was poor upon their arrival and struggled from time-to-time, but the father, Muhammad, was a very hard- working man. He discovered he could support his family by owning and operating a local automotive repair shop in an underdeveloped neighborhood. On one particular morning, he began a conversation with one of his customers. The customer was under the impression that he would not have to pay for an inspection because his vehicle had not passed. Muhammad routinely makes recommendations for customers of this caliber. He addressed the issue with the customer promptly and reviewed the repair list of what was needed before the vehicle could pass the state emissions inspections test. The customer reluctantly agreed to pay the $40 inspection cost and bring the car back after repairs for a re-inspection, free of charge. Later that evening Muhammad was found brutally murdered in his shop. Investigators believed it to be an aggravated robbery because of the broken cash register, but later discovered that only $40 was missing from the drawer. The family not only suffered from the loss of Muhammad, but from the inability of the police to find his killer.

My script was driven by this story. That said, I purposely changed the race of the family to uplift the African American Muslim. In my film I attempted to show that minorities could own successful businesses in the community and serve others as well. I also tried to show that minorities upon minorities commit not all acts of hatred. The person in my film was loosely based on a Caucasian male who was a victim of low economic background and probably had suffered the same struggles as most minorities similarly situated. Not often in films do we show antagonist portrayed in this way. This was my attempt to show the audience that Caucasians are as capable of committing heinous acts of crime against minority small business owners who happen to be Muslim and who the media fail to portray terrorists. My intention in the film was not to demonstrate the ethnicity of any character, but rather show how Muslims are peaceful people; searching for provisions the same as everyone else. I also wanted to show that the American dream knows no color.

The initial goal for the film was to bring about diversity to my project and, most importantly, remind my audience that we all have the same trials and struggles regardless of religious or ethical backgrounds. I wanted my audience; specifically, those not labeled “minority” to see my film in the light of “normal” roles being reversed. I hoped it would be seen as to demonstrate how anyone can engage in criminal behavior. I knew that some people might be uncomfortable seeing a Caucasian male killing an African American Muslim male, who had seen success by owning a business and supporting a family. The film was intended to cause some controversy.

I encompassed some difficulty at the time of casting due to the fact that this was my first film project. After this process, I learned that when presenting a storyline, one must be clear and concise to get actors to understand their characters’ motivation. Eventually, I landed a majority Muslim cast to act in this film. The experience I gained from this film, as well as my understandings of the Holy Quran, prompted me to imagine ideas for my next film. I understood that in this film, I accomplished my goal of giving my audience a visual understanding of the role reversal. However, I had failed to include a general understanding of some of the Islamic customs and its true meaning.

In my film “Hijab,” I attempted to address some of the Islamic customs relating to women. In the Muslim community, we identify women who evidence their faith with the wearing of the hijab as a Hijabi. This was particularly meaningful to me as I wear a hijab on a daily basis. I wanted to take a modern day approach and provide my audience with an insider’s view of some of the more social aspects of a wearing a hijab in a public. The film focuses on a girl who made the decision at a young age to begin wearing the hijab and the scrutiny she faced while attending school. The viewers see some of the struggles young girls experience wearing the hijab in public schools. Identity crisis and dealing with isolation are real issues when Muslim girls attend schools and there is not a huge presence of Muslim students attending classes. Sometimes these girls have to decide how will they fit in when Society presents them which such a negative connotation and often leaves these girls targets for bullying. Meanwhile, the Hijabi character in class is concentrating on her studies when a male classmate removes her covering from behind and the entire class begins to laugh at her. This is a common issue in the American school system and more prevalent since 9/11. Whether the younger students were curious as to why she was covered, or the classmate was just acting as a class clown, the lack of sensitivity for her religious belief caused her remove hijab when she attended school. I faced the real possibility of such targeted and unprovoked actions and this was the foundation of the initial concerns of my parents when I attended the public school system. The story line continues as she attends a university and sees another Muslim woman attending the same class. She becomes inspired by her modesty and is reminded of the childhood event. At that moment, the character looks deeply into the mirror and is no longer stifled in by the normalization of society. In fact, she embraces being identified as a Hijabi and embraces the beginnings of a new journey. Rightfully so, she begins to wear the hijab again. Hopefully, I was able to portray this by showing her leaving the building and holding the door as others passed. I choose this exit as a symbol for her embarkation into the world to inspire others. This is also something I hope to do one day. At the end of the film, the Hijabi character realizes that the acceptance for which she has been searching was not with students in the classroom, but from within herself. I learned making this film that I wanted to go deeper into societal norms and the different views people may have with women who have made the decision to wear the hijab. I took a similar approach, but from an aspect of those who put on the hijab after converting to Islam.

“Converting to Islam,” is an interview style documentary film based on the experiences of a few women and how those experiences lead them to convert to Islam. Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world with over 100,000 converts worldwide (www.quora.com 2015). The United States accounts for 20 percent of that alone (www.quora.com 2015). In this film, I used additional research including YouTube as a reference from speakers such as, Yusuf Estes, an American Preacher who converted to Islam from Christianity in 1991. I actually found his story most inspiring. I decided that he would be a great archival reference because of his status. Not only does he speak with so much conviction; he also provides Bible and Quran references in conferences. His story of conversion to Islam begins with his studies from the different Bibles his family read. At the time, there was a Muslim man with whom he used to converse regarding religious topics. One day Yusef asked him, “How many versions of the Quran do you guys have?” The man stated one. Yusef was trying to understand why Christianity was better than Islam. In his search, Yusef realized that through the Quran, he was able to understand the Bible more clearly. In fact, when he would give his sermons, he felt as though the Quran did a better job explaining Christianity to his congregation. He later became a Muslim Chaplain for the United States Bureau of Prisons. One of my interviewees, Najat, grew up in a predominately Christian household and struggled in her understandings as to why Jesus (Peace be Upon Him) was son the of God and not the other prophets (peace be upon them). Najat did not understand why she had to pray to Jesus to get God’s blessings. After some research, she was able to find Jesus in Islam and discovered that she could pray to God directly and felt fulfilled with that. She began wearing her hijab and it became an embodiment of who she is as a person. Najat goes on to state she can no longer leave her home without it and not wearing it gives her a feeling of nakedness. Vanessa, another interviewee for the film, stated that she stumbled across Islam due to her own ignorance because she had been misinformed by what was presented to her on a television show. It was not until Vanessa approached someone and discussed with them why all Muslims were bad people without realizing that the person to whom she was speaking was a Muslim himself. He gave her some information regarding the religion and suggested that she continue her research on her own. It took some convincing on her behalf but eventually, she accepted Islam as her religion. I think her story is unique because here is a person, not purposely searching for Islam who discovered it by happenstance. Hajar, on the other hand, my third and final interviewee discovered Islam after the pain of an uncertainty of moving from a small town to a big city. Through her prayers, she found the religion. According to an estimate by Pew Research Center, there are approximately 1.6 billion Muslims in the world. This is roughly 23 percent of the world's population.

I find it intriguing that the population of Muslim converts continue to increase during a time where the media has such a negative connotation regarding the religion. Regardless, people convert into Islam for a variety of reasons and with each conversion comes a new opportunity for Muslims to re-impact the world and become an ambassador for peace and spread the belief that our spiritually can cross over any border or obstacle that has been placed in the way.

As I began to overcome obstacles of my own in my documentary filmmaking, I discovered a beautiful young lady named Jamie. Her story of heroism and adversity is one that I hope will inspire and inform many. Jamie suffers from Ataxia, an extremely rare neurological disorder. Individuals diagnosed with Ataxia suffer from a lack of muscle coordination that may affect speech, eye movements, the ability to swallow, walking, picking up objects, and other voluntary movements (www.medicalnewstoday.com 2017). According to Ataxia.org, “Diagnosis is based on a person's medical history, family history, and a complete neurological evaluation including an MRI scan of the brain. Various blood tests may be performed to rule out other possible disorders, which may present similar symptoms. Genetic blood tests are now available for some types of hereditary ataxia to confirm a diagnosis or as a predictive test to determine if someone has inherited an ataxia gene known to affect other family members.”

Jamie’s Ataxia is hereditary. Unfortunately, her mother, two uncles, and middle sister also suffer from the disease. If either parent carries the chromosome, there is a 50 percent chance it will be passed to the next generation. It can take years for people to show signs of the disorder, one of the first being fatigue. Jamie was viewed as being lazy in the Army because she was unable to complete routine training drills. Jamie was eventually recommended to go to medical and have an observation. She was diagnosed with Ataxia at this time. Jamie has a form of Ataxia called Cerebellar Ataxia. This type of Ataxia is deadly and will eventually shut her body down. Her sister has already become bedridden due to the disorder and is completely immobile. She has two children in their late teens. The teens expressed their concerns for contracting the disorder, but there are literally no signs until an individual reaches their late 20’s, which explains why Jamie was allowed to serve in the military. Although she was diagnosed with Ataxia, Jamie was able to finish college. Before her diagnoses, she had goals of becoming a doctor. She admits that it took her over a year to accept that this was really happening to her, as she gradually began to lose control over basic body functions, such as walking and standing. I thought it would be a good idea to document her struggles because many people are unaware of her situation. In fact, most people would see Jamie and think that she is intoxicated, due to the loss of balance when she walks. After I completed the film I gave Jamie copy, and a few months later a local organization used the film in a campaign to gain awareness about Ataxia. Jamie now sits on the panel of this group and hopefully, her story will be shared with others and maybe one day we will find a cure for this disorder.

In my quest of bringing attention to untold stories in my documentary filmmaking, I decided to do a piece on a subject we should all be aware of, or at the very least, have a fundamental understanding of, the American prison system. This topic has been one of great debate in previous and current presidential elections. Almost every community throughout our great nation is affected by it. According to prisonpolicy.com, there are over 1,800 Federal and State prisons in the U.S. This number does not include (?) juvenile corrections or local jails. America houses over 2.2 million prisoners every year (www.prisonpolicy.org 2016). However, my approach to this film was not to bring additional attention to how overpopulated our prison system is, or the fact that our justice system is corrupt and owned by large private corporations. My objective was to interview an individual coming home from prison after being incarcerated for five years.

Rashad Released, is a documentary based on my eldest brother and his exit from the prison system, after spending years locked down in a correctional facility. I personally know the impact his incarceration had on our family and I must admit it was tough, but I wanted to know, “What impact did it have on his life?” I filmed him as he experienced his first taste of freedom and wanted to know what would be his process of rebuilding the relationships destroyed in his absence? It was a very raw and emotional documentary as I interviewed his oldest son, who only wanted his father to be an active part in his life. His mom, a very beautiful and charismatic woman, expressed how deeply sadden she was to see her oldest child go down the path he chose. However, she was very optimistic that the time spent allowed him to reflect on the decisions he made; and she could not wait to have her child back in her life again.

There was a little resilience from the children’s mothers as they had grown accustomed to raising their children as single parents. Mainly, their concern was how he would work on providing for children after the moments of freedom were settled. There is no doubt that when any parent is missing from the household, the children suffer the most. This documentary gave Rashad an outlet to express himself to all those relationships. After returning home, he suffered significant vision loss from glaucoma. Since filming has ended, he has maintained a steady job at a seafood restaurant, which is quite an accomplishment given his disability and background. Between work and family, Rashad has been managing to stay away from trouble and has maintained a consistent relationship with God. I learned in filming this documentary that sometimes emotions alone can tell a story and all that is needed is for the camera to roll.

My final documentary is in regards to another inspiring young lady who suffers from a disability as well. This film is currently in production as her story continues to unfold. Over the course of filming, I grew very close to Chassidy. Her personality is vibrant and just captures anyone who is lucky enough to have the opportunity to meet her. Chassidy has a very supportive network filled with family and friends who genuinely care for her because of her condition. She was born without any arms or legs, a condition called Amelia. However, she is by no means handicap. Chassidy has graduated college, lives on her own with the care of her younger sister not far away, and she also has a full-time job as a counselor. She is very independent, to say the least, but does need assistance with some day to day task. This film really shines when the two sisters interact with each other. After observing them both, I noticed that they call each other Pinky and the Brain. I asked them to expand on this, and their reply made sense. They work together in unison as one is accustomed to doing a majority of the thinking and the other does much of the movement. I continue to learn from these two ladies and plan to wrap up filming very soon.

In conclusion, art and life have a similar relationship to Chassidy and her sister. Each compliments the other; each just goes together with the other. My intention was not to compete or take anything away from the powerhouse of today’s media but to add untold stories and share them in my films. Hopefully, my audience will watch my films and gain an informative and educated experience.

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About the Creator

Fatimah Jawad

A filmmaker, trying to document great stories, as well as write them!

Instagram @reelcovergirl

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