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Endometriosis

Living in a Pain-torn Body

By Elizabeth AdolphiPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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Photograph by Medical News Today

Way back in 2001 when I was 11, I never dreamed the next 16 years of my life would be filled with the most excruciating pain month after month; I never imagined I would feel the judging glances in the pharmacy when I went to pick up my medication or at camp when I had to explain what the medication was used for because of the stigma of this particular type; I never thought I would miss a mass accumulation of days from work and school because my body was racked with numbing pain; I never thought there could be a name for what I would be suffering with for the next 16 years.

Month after month for the next 16 years I would come to dread and fear the one thing that, in my mind, made a woman a woman. There were days when I could not move, eat, or drink because my body rejected those things with violent trips to the bathroom to vomit.

I often wondered if I was "abnormal" or "weak" because adult women told me it was just part of being a woman. Their advice was to exercise, eat differently, and then exercise more. They did not believe me when I said exercise made the pain worse and eating differently did not get rid of the pain.

Nobody I knew had a monthly cycle like mine and I felt like I was going crazy. One of the worst times was when I went to get an ultrasound done and the looks I received as I sat waiting with my mom (I was 16 at the time) were judgmental beyond belief. I was not pregnant; I was at my wits end trying to find out why my body was going through so much pain. The ultrasound came up empty and I left without any answers, only rude stares.

For the next eight years, I would suffer more than I could ever have imagined; not just because the pain was getting worse with each month, but also because I did not have any answers. I went on and off the birth control pill trying to not only regulate my courses, but to attempt to lessen the pain. But, this was during a time when the pill was, in my completely biased opinion, poorly made because if I missed a day, I would get my courses and for a week be incapacitated.

Finally, when I was around 24 I met with a specialist who diagnosed me with Endometriosis. After over a decade of pain and questioning my strength as a woman, I found out I was not a wimp, but I had a condition and there were steps to take to put it under control. There is no cure and the lack of awareness does not help the push for a cure.

This past year I had my first laparoscopy to have an "official" diagnosis for my endometriosis and to burn off what spots they could find that were not on any major organs. Thankfully, all the tiny spots of endometriosis were located on my uterus, and even though the pain I've had since I was 11 has been excruciating, I was only at the first stage.

Having that official diagnosis for my medical records helped me more mentally than physically. I knew I was not "crazy" or "weak" for complaining for years about my pain; at last I had an answer and a stepping stone placed in front of me to get to a new path.

The only part of endometriosis that really irritates me is the lack of knowledge and awareness. I used to be uncomfortable explaining my condition, but now I thrive on making people aware of it. Just because it cannot be seen does not mean it does not exist; it is the epicenter of many lives and for some women, it is their master. The world needs to know about endometriosis and to acknowledge the women it controls.

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About the Creator

Elizabeth Adolphi

As a child I had a flair for the dramatic; as an adult, the flair has turned into a subtle, yet continuous hum. I love to see the world through different scopes and to tell stories based on the takeaway. Cheers!

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