#metoo
You are not alone. Together we can de-stigmatize speaking out about our experiences with sexual harassment, assault, and more.
You Don't Know Until You Know
Growing up as a girl, you're taught to live in fear. You're told not to dress a certain way, act a certain way, and never walk around alone at night. Don't drink, otherwise there might just be a man hiding in the bushes in a dark alley way just waiting to attack. Always make sure someone knows where you are, where you are going, and what time you will be home.
Letitia LouPublished 6 years ago in VivaThe “R” Word
Some of you may know what “r” word I will be referring to, and for those of you who don’t, you’ll pick up on it. May 2017, I was home, waiting for my parents to leave the house so I’d be able to sneak out and go see a boy I had a crush on. I was 14 at the time and dumber than ever. It took 30 minutes to convince my parents that I’d be fine at home by myself and when they finally left, it felt like the biggest accomplishment I’d ever achieved. As they left the driveway, I quickly grabbed my phone and opened snapchat to tell the guy that he should start driving to my house. This was the first time I lied to my parents face like that. I hated it. I didn’t want to in the first place, but the guy convinced me we’d have a great time and I wouldn’t regret lying to them. He had my 14-year-old naive self convinced. He told me the plan was to jam out in his car and smoke some pot. A few minutes before he arrived, I texted our mutual friend whom also introduced the boy and I to each other and told her I was seeing him again. She immediately responded telling me to not see him and that I’m stupid for wanting to see him again. I kept asking her why and she never answered me. I was still texting her as I stepped into his car. I put my phone up and there wasn’t much talk at all, he just asked where to park and I led him to a dead end by my house. Once he parked, he pulled my shirt and shoved his lips on mine and bit my lip so hard I thought I was bleeding. Before I could even process what was happening he pulled me on top of him, he then unbuttoned his pants and said he liked the way I looked at it. He pushed my head down and wouldn’t stop until I was choking on him. He hit the right side of my back and butt multiple times, with me trying to scream every hit. He pulled me up and choked me with his hand. He whispered “this is what you get for making me wait to see you” He kept a tight hold on my neck until my eyes started to water. The said, “I want to stick my d*ck in you.” I closed my eyes and was waiting for me to wake up from this nightmare. I heard him keep calling me beautiful and wouldn’t stop trying to convince me to have sex with him. Before I said anything he told me to get in the back seat, already pushing through the space between the two front seats. Thinking back, I could have left then, I could have ran and none of what happened next would have happened. He took advantage of me. The whole time he switched from intercourse to oral on him. He was very forceful. He kept hitting my back and bottom every chance he got. I had bruises for days. He told me to call him daddy and talk dirty to him. When I refused, he choked me until my neck was sore. He told me to turn around with my back to him. He told me that he was going to put his penis into my butt. I finally got the courage to say “no, no, no, please, stop, I don’t want this, stop, it hurts, it hurts.” He didn’t even hesitate. he kept going. Somehow I eventually pushed him off. I started to cry. I could hear the anger and frustration in his voice. I knew to be careful. He kept saying that he was sorry and to let him finish. He kept trying to get me to swallow his semen. He tried to push my head on him but I resisted and shut my mouth. He grabbed my hair and forced my head in from of him and finished on my chest. I was so weak. I didn’t want to move. I didn’t want to breathe. I wish he would have brought a gun and killed me right then. He asked me if I was going to leave or just stay in his car like the lazy slut I was. I got out of the car and started to walk home, crying. As soon as I got home, I saw my parents. They asked me where I was and I told them I went for a walk. I quickly ran to my bathroom telling them that I slipped in mud and felt gross. I took a shower, even though I already took one earlier that day and scrubbed my body until my skin was red, but nothing seemed to rub the dirt he left that would be on my skin for the rest of my life.
Kaeleigh MiraclePublished 6 years ago in VivaSeparating The Art From The Person
"The trick is to enjoy life and accept that it has no meaning whatsoever" - Vicki Christina Barcelona Imagine that. My favorite quote in the universe heard in one of my favorite movies, written by a man accused of child molestation. I was too young, the first time I watched Vicki Christina Barcelona, to know or care about Woody Allen, which means I was probably too young to watch it in the first place. I don't even think I knew he directed it at the time. I was so enthralled with the masterpieces of actresses that are Penelope Cruz, Scarlett Johansson, and Rebecca Hall. Woody who?
How #MeToo Has Reshaped Society
This year, brave individuals, men and women, have come forward to reveal the people who have assaulted them, whether it is sexual harassment, sexual misconduct, even to the extremes of rape. However, despite all this, we NEED to do better. To be better. What does this mean? We need to have the same accountability that is not just applied to business, but also to politics. We also need to have heavier repercussions for those who engage in such behaviors.
Yoshio ChandlerPublished 6 years ago in Viva#Me Too
I sat at my computer innocently scrolling through Facebook when I see the first signs of a movement. #MeToo written on status after status after status of my female friends and comments following made by men telling them that no one wants to hear it or they're making it up. That they should be glad they got the attention they did. A comment on every status I saw and I felt my anger rising, opening my status bar and typing in the hashtag to lend my voice to the movement sweeping the nation and I stopped... erasing the words and clicking to a different screen. A movement for women to shock people with the rates of sexual assault or harassment that I could lend my voice to but all I could think of was what speaking out cost me.
Lilli BehomPublished 6 years ago in VivaRuined
It all started my sophomore year of college. Fall semester finals had just finished for me and now I was just waiting a couple days to catch the train home for winter break. It's the only reason I went to the party.
It Is Not Your Duty to Be the Perfect Survivor
1. It is NEVER your fault. Sexual violence is a REAL issue. It can happen to anyone regardless of age, gender, race, or religious preference. It is very easy to blame yourself as well as for others to blame you. The truth is, it is never your fault, plain & simple. It does not matter if you were drunk. It does not matter what you were wearing. It does not matter if you were walking in a dark alley late at night by yourself. The person who commits this horrendous act is solely to blame for their actions, not you. So forget what people may say, forget what society pushes upon you, and forget what the media shoves down your throat. The more people that can stand up against shaming the survivors, the more we can work together to end this epidemic.
RaeAnna MercadoPublished 6 years ago in VivaMore Than Rape
When I was in 7th grade, we read To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee. I was in advanced English and we were expected to be more mature than the rest of the students in our year, so this book was perfect. There was death, discrimination, the n-word was used, and, sadly enough, a rape accusation. However, I had a hard time wrapping my mind around the phrase “taken advantage of.” What made this even more absurd was the fact that there was no actual rape in that instance. I understood that to mean you’re being used or cheated, you’re being naive, or you’re simply too ditzy to know what’s going on. Rape is not so benign.
The Silence Breaks
2017 has been a rough year. But this video, highlighting Time's Persons of the Year, The Silence Breakers, has legitimately brought me to tears.
Tarin CampanellaPublished 6 years ago in Viva#MeToo
I don't share this with people usually because, in the past, whenever I have attempted to, they have felt uncomfortable and asked me not to. But if listening to it makes you uncomfortable, then imagine how I feel having to live with the memory and knowing I can't tell anyone at the risk of making them uncomfortable. I've been ready to break my silence for so long, but no one was willing to listen until now.
Let's Play a Game
I've always said I should write a book about my life. Then again I guess we could all say that. I find it easier to tell my story in bits and pieces, because 33 years is a lot to sum up into one story. This story is true, something that really happened to me. I find a kind of solace in being able to tell my story, as dark and disturbing as it may be, some might say, "Stop I can't hear anymore" I wish that it was that easy for me.
Megan VasquezPublished 6 years ago in VivaConsent
"Consent is an act of reason and deliberation. A person who possesses and exercises sufficient mental capacity to make an intelligent decision demonstrates consent by performing an act recommended by another."
Catriona BoardmanPublished 6 years ago in Viva