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10 Things We Need to Stop Saying

And we need to do it now!

By Shana NizeulPublished 6 years ago 6 min read
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There are so many casual expressions and sayings that are actually really sexist, and just plain infuriating. Some of these I've heard people say, and some of them I found while I while researching for this blog. Now mostly, they're directed at women, but there are some that are directed at men. So here are ten sexist phrases/ideas that I wish would just die already.

1. You run/throw/hit like a girl.

This one is so stupid. Because having a vagina automatically makes you weak and bad at sports, right?

2. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

This one is annoying on so many levels. If a husband receives some kind of request or direction from his wife, then she is automatically nagging and bitching at him. Then she must be the one who "wears the pants" in their relationship. And if it's the man who is "wearing the pants" then he is seen as the domineering one, with the meek little wife who takes orders from her husband. Neither of which is a great scenario. If you've experienced this type of relationship then you will know that this isn't a partnership. This is a controlling, bullshit type of relationship. No person should be controlling the other.

3. Using genitalia based insults - "Stop being a pussy" or "Have/grow some balls."

I don't know when this became a thing. But telling someone to have some balls is telling them to be strong and tough—something that balls definitely are not. You can give balls a light tap, and it's all over. It's all just connected to the social construct that men have to be the provider and the protector. Same thing with, "Stop being a pussy." Even though the vagina is strong and resilient as fuck, and it should be praised. Not used as an insult. Men are expected to keep everything inside, and not show too much emotion. Because that is a feminine thing. It's all backwards.

4. Calling women sluts or whores for enjoying sex.

Seriously, women can't win on the sex issue. If we don't fuck you right away, then we're prudes or uptight. But if we are sexually empowered and have sex with you quickly, then we're a slut. Or—just not "girlfriend material" because we slept together too fast. Why does this make a woman undateable, but the man is still boyfriend material? I mean, there could be a single woman and a single man who have had sex with the same number of people, but she is a slut and he is just playing the field. Give me a fucking break and shove your double standards up your ass. Everyone, and I mean everyone, loves sex. No matter what your gender is.

5. Boys will be boys.

This is one of those old adages that needs to be taken out back and shot. Using this bullshit, blanket statement, to explain away something horrible a man has done should've never been acceptable. It starts when they're really young. If he shoves you down at recess or pulls your hair - Oh he just likes you. And, boys will be boys. When a teenage boy gets aggressive with his girlfriend and she asks why, someone might tell her it's just his hormones and he can't help it. Because, boys will be boys. When a husband cheats on his wife, because that's just how they are, they can't help it. Because the boys who will be boys eventually grow up to be men who can't control themselves. And then it's men will be men. And that is a straight up shame.

6. Shaming of rape victims with shitty questions like - "What were you wearing?" or "How much did you have to drink?"

You know what she was wearing? Clothes. You know what she had to drink? Liquids. It makes me so fucking angry. What does that have to do with someone forcibly putting their penis inside of another person? Something they didn't consent to and something they didn't want. It's almost as if they are looking for excuses, up front, as to why the man raped her. Or what she did to make him rape her. It's just so fucked up.

7. Telling a woman that her clothing or appearance is a distraction.

Remember as early as junior high, when you were told that your tank top straps were too skinny, too much of your legs were showing, or that you needed to put on a bra. All because it made the boys unable to pay attention or do their work. They were just too distracted. Oh ok...let's just tell women to cover up and be ashamed of their bodies. And be ever aware of the epidermis's effect on the drooling masses that are boys and men. Seriously? Fuck you! My knees and shoulders shouldn't be considered sexy. It's hot, I want to wear a sleeveless shirt. But a man can't handle that? What, his penis takes over his brain and he just can't function? Let's stop shaming women, and let's teach our young boys about body autonomy and self control.

8. I'm not like other girls.

I will have to admit that I'm super guilty of this one. I said this all the time. All throughout high school and college. Using it to mean that I'm a laid-back, chill girl, who just wants to hang out. I won't give you shit or get emotional like other girls. I don't get jealous or controlling. I'm cool.....Just one of the guys.....I was such an idiot.....looking back on it, I realize that it was a huge dig to other girls. And women in general. So if I'm cool, then other girls aren't? Other girls are emotional and whiny and needy. I'm not, and that's why I'm cool. Damn, I sound like such an asshole. I really wish I knew more about female empowerment back then....because what I meant to say was, 'hey, this is me and this is how I am......that's why I'm awesome.'

9. Calling women bossy and men assertive.

The whole time I was growing up, I was told that I was bossy, a bitch, or intimidating. Things that just aren't said to men. Men are assertive, truthful, and have presence. Women are seen as demure and delicate creatures, and I have never fit into that mold. When you tell a women she's being bossy, when she's just being direct and honest, you're telling her that her feelings aren't valid. Because if a man told you the same thing, he would be just stating his opinion. It's so fucking annoying.

10. Oh your husband made dinner, you have him well trained!

This one has always seemed off to me, even when I was a little kid. Whenever people would joke around, about having to train your husband, I would always find it odd. I mean, he's not a puppy. So if you have a division of the household responsibilities that includes your husband cooking, or doing laundry, then you trained him well? Because there's no way that a man is going to clean up or cook a meal in his own home? If the person you are with needs training, then I don't think you're with the right person.

So there you have it. Ten sexist, bullshit phrases and ideas that piss me off.

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About the Creator

Shana Nizeul

Hey everyone! Here I am- happy wife, SAHM, badass photographer, and sometimes writer. Hope you like what you read!

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