Low Self-Esteem

In the United Kingdom, three-quarters of the women who live there are unhappy with the shape of their bodies. In addition, a whopping 6 out of 10 feel their bodies make them depressed. If there are this many women in the U.K who are unhappy with the way they look, imagine how many women are in the world that feels this exact same way. There are many causes of low self-esteem and there are many ways to overcome it.

I feel the number one cause of low self-esteem is the media. Women are defined by how they look based off of what the media think they should look like. We believe that if we are to have this size zero waist, the biggest butt, the biggest breasts, and the face of a silicone doll, then we are defined "beautiful." The media has so much control over our lives it is absolutely ridiculous, ranging from how much silicone we have in our bodies to how much make-up we have on our face; this is how we determine how beautiful we are.

Cause number two of low self-esteem could derive from of an ex-lover, how they belittled you or how they criticised every little thing about you. They never thought you were good enough. For instance, going and dying your hair to see if that makes them happy, but come to find out it just makes things worse. They say that it makes your face look fat or that the color is too dark and it makes you look too pale. Or getting new clothes that make you look slimmer but he/she tells you that it was a waste of money. We are so consumed with the thought of what others think of us—especially our lovers—we forget how to love ourselves.

Lastly, cause number four. Being picked on for those minuscule flaws. I remember a time specifically where I had posted a picture on my Facebook and I had multiple people direct message me and tell me that I looked like I was "on something" or "your smile is so jacked up" or "one of your eyes is bigger than the other." I went and looked at the picture and instantly hated how unsymmetrical my face is. It got to the point where it made me sick just looking at it. So, like any normal teenager would do with a bad photo... I deleted it. I went to school the next day and hid my face from my peers because I was so afraid that someone was going to find something new to pick on me about. Now, mind you, I was in the 9th grade. A 9th grader was so self-conscious about herself it made her sick.

As stated above, there are ways to overcome low self-esteem. It may take a while to do it, but it will be so worth it in the end.

To overcome low self-esteem we need to avoid negative self-talk. What I mean by this is when you are looking at that reflection in the mirror, you don't need to say,"God, I hate the way that this looks," or,"Why do I have to look this way?" What you do need to say is, "I look great!" or, "I feel great!" No matter how you feel in that moment, giving yourself that reassurance that you feel good will ultimately make you feel better about yourself.

We need to learn to be assertive. When someone starts picking on you about those flaws, we need to learn to say we don't appreciate it or that what they had said about us had hurt our feelings. When we don't do this our brain likes to keep that one obstructive comment at the front, meaning, we think about it and we think about it and we think about it until it literally tears us apart from the inside out.

In addition, we need to focus on our positives. Instead of pointing out all the bad things we hate about ourselves, we need to point out the things we love about ourselves. If that means repeating the same thing over and over again, do it. Or one day you could point out this thing you love about yourself and the next to another. Make a list of everything you love about yourself, stand in a mirror, look dead in your own eyes (with a smile, of course) and tell yourself, "YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL." Give yourself the empowerment you need.

As Mandy Hale says, "Self-worth is so vital to your happiness. If you don't feel good about you, it's hard to feel good about anything else." Go out and live your greatest life. Empower yourself and maybe someone else! Watch the way you transform into this person who could hardly look in the mirror to this person who is so obsessed with herself that she has no room for negativity!